The well proportioned though nearsighted secretary like to spend her lunch hour sunbathing on her office building’s roof. Wanting an even facial tan, she always left her glasses lying on her desk. After a few days, she decided that, since no one could see her anyway, she might as well get a more “overall tan.” [...]
These military jokes never cease to be funny - especially ones like this!
The Commanding Officer of a U. S. Marine Corps regiment was waiting for the coffee to finish brewing, so he decided to kill a little time by asking all assembled a question. “How much of sex is work and how much is pleasure?” [...]
An old man said to his doctor, “Doc, tomorrow’s my eightieth birthday. I want to do it just one more time before I die, so I’ve hired a hooker for the night. Can you give me something to get it up?” The doctor smiled. “Normally, I don’t prescribe this stuff, but in your case, I [...]
Two blondes were walking down the street when one saw a compact lying on the sidewalk. She picked it up, opened it, looked in the mirror, and said, “Hmm, this person looks familiar.” The other blonde said, “Let me see.” She grabbed the compact, took a look and said, “You dumbass! That’s me!”
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Little Johnny jokes crack me up, didn’t we all know somebody like this when we were kids?
Little Johnny was five years old and just learning to read. He and his mother were reading a book on animals when he pointed at one page and cried, “Look, Mommy! It’s a frickin’ elephant!” His mother took a [...]
An elderly couple has only been in bed for a few minutes when the man farts. He says, “7 points!” She asks, “7 points for what?” The old man replies, “It’s fart football.” A minute later, she fires one off. “Touchdown! Tie score,” she announces. A few minutes pass and the old man farts again. [...]
A doctor puts a terribly overweight blonde on a diet. “Eat regularly for two days and then skip a day. Repeat this for two weeks and then come see me. By then you should have lost five pounds.” The blonde returns after two weeks, but she’s lost twenty pounds! “That’s amazing!” says her doctor. “Did [...]
Wow, I’ve heard a lot of “great blonde jokes” but this one really threw me!
A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an expensive, expertly tailored black suit.
The female blonde mortician asks the deceased’s wife how she would like the body dressed. She points out that the man does look [...]
Why It’s No Fun To Be A Penis: You’re bald your whole life; you have a hole in your head; your neighbors are nuts; the guy closest to you is an a$$hole; and everytime you get excited, you throw up and then faint!A blonde got a new sports car for a birthday present. While was [...]
Why It’s No Fun To Be A Penis: You’re bald your whole life; you have a hole in your head; your neighbors are nuts; the guy closest to you is an a$$hole; and everytime you get excited, you throw up and then faint!
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