Archive for 'Airport Jokes' Category
What’s the Hurry?
An airline pilot announced over the intercom, “Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. We’ve reached our cruising altitude of 33,000 feet, and it looks like we’re going to be right on time. Thank you for flying with us.” Then, wrongly believing he had switched off his microphone, said, “Take the wheel, will ya, Jim? I’m gonna [...]
At the Airport
A guy sitting in the Atlanta airport bar couldn’t ignore the beautiful woman sitting nearby. “She must be a flight attendant,” he thought, “so gorgeous. But which airline?” He leaned over and uttered the Delta slogan, “Love to fly and it shows?” She gave him a blank, confused stare. Hmm, not Delta. Maybe American? “Something [...]
Now Do You Feel Better (joke)?
A small man had the window seat on a plane when a huge, mean-looking hulk plopped down beside him. After they were airborne, the little guy got airsick but was afraid to wake the now-sleeping giant beside him and there was no way he could climb over him to get to the bathroom. When the [...]
The Blind Pilot
All the passengers were onboard the small, third-world, puddle-jumping, commuter plane waiting for take-off. The stewardess assured them that their pilots will arrive soon; they were “delayed on another flight.” Eventually, two uniformed men wearing dark glasses entered the plane. One used a guide dog, while the other tapped his way into the cockpit with [...]
Gay Flight Attendant
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and told us that “Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he’ll be landing the [...]
