After the executive hired a hot new secretary, it was only a few days before he put the moves on her. She readily agreed and they had a great time. But after a week or so, she started taking advantage of their relationship, showing up late for work, being surly to clients, losing messages, turning out sloppy work. Finally, he pulled her aside for a little talk. “Listen, baby, we may have gone to bed together a few times, but who said you could start slacking off on the job???? She gave him a sly smile and purred, “My lawyer!???
When I awoke this morning, I was aware it wasn’t an ordinary day. I felt an inner sense that made me want to close my eyes and go back to sleep. Then I remembered it was my birthday, and at my age, who needs another one? I arose, showered, dressed and descended the stairs, bracing myself for the usual chorus of “Happy Birthday” from the kids. But there was none. Not even a cheerful “Happy Birthday, Dear” from my wife. Instead of being grateful that so far the world had allowed me to ignore it, I felt even a deeper gloom. As I entered my office, my lovely blonde secretary greeted me with nothing more than “Good Morning, Mr. Smith”. Then at 11:30 it happened. My secretary came in all smiles and said, “It’s such a beautiful day, I’ve decided to take you to a darling little place for lunch to celebrate your birthday”. We arrived, had a few drinks and a wonderful lunch. On the way back to the office, she said “Now we’ll stop by my apartment where it is quiet and we will have more privacy.” When we arrived, she mixed me a drink and then excused herself to “change into something more comfortable.” “Ah,” I thought, “this is a good world after all.” Soon she called out, “Are you ready for my little surprise?” Her bedroom door opened and there she stood holding a huge birthday cake aglow with candles. There also stood my wife and kids, their eyes aglow with love, and there I stood wearing nothing but my socks.