http://www.topjokes.info Jokes, Funny Jokes, Dirty Jokes, Blonde Jokes, Adult Jokes, and Funny Stuff to Keep you Laughing! Fri, 11 Jul 2008 13:36:11 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en A woman held a young baby in the doctor's examination room. When the doctor arrived, he examined the baby, weighed it, and found it slightly below normal. "Is this baby breast-fed or bottle-fed," he asked. "Breast fed," she replied. "Strip down to your waist," he ordered. She did. He pressed, ... http://www.topjokes.info/the-baby-at-the-doctor-joke/ A farmer dropped by the local tavern, ordered a cold one and said, "This is a special day. I'm celebrating." "What a coincidence," said the woman on the next stool. "I'm celebrating, too." "What are you celebrating?" she asked, clinking glasses with him. "I've been raising chickens, but my hens ... http://www.topjokes.info/the-celebration-joke/ Every Sunday, during the children's sermon, all the children attending church were invited to come forward. One morning, as they sat down, the pastor remarked to one little girl, "What a pretty dress! Is it new?" The little girl replied directly into the pastor's microphone, "Yes, and Mommy says it's ... http://www.topjokes.info/what-a-pretty-dress-joke/ A special agent, an administrative specialist and an office manager were walking to lunch when they found an antique lamp. They rubbed it and of course a magic genie appeared in a puff of smoke. "Since I always grant three wishes, you each may have one." "Me, first! Me, first!" ... http://www.topjokes.info/the-special-agent-the-admin-and-the-office-manager-joke/ A man asked the pharmacist for a vial of cyanide. "What for?" asked the pharmacist. "I want to poison my wife." "Sir, I can't sell you cyanide for that!" The man reached into his wallet, pulled out a photograph of his wife, and laid it on the counter. The pharmacist ... http://www.topjokes.info/a-man-in-the-pharmacy-joke/ A blonde walking by a travel agency notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99!" She goes inside, hands the agent her money, and says, "I'd like the $99 cruise special, please." The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner ... http://www.topjokes.info/the-blonde-and-the-travel-agency-joke/ The Sunday School teacher asked her class, "Which part of the body gets to heaven first?" Little Suzi quickly raised her hand. "I think it's your mind, teacher, because you have to have a mind to believe in God." "Very good, Suzi." Little Cathy's hand went up. "I think it's ... http://www.topjokes.info/little-johnny-and-heaven-joke/ An elderly couple decides, "Tonight is the night." She slips into something sexy and crawls into bed. He heads into the bathroom. She waits and waits until she can't stand the suspense; she climbs out of bed, gets up, goes to the bathroom, and opens the door. She sees him ... http://www.topjokes.info/sexy-seniors/ An old Indian was sitting in front of the hardware store. Every time a pretty woman passed by, he raised his hand and said, "Chance." One curious woman asked him, "Why is it that whenever a woman walks past, you raise your hand and say 'Chance?' I thought Indians raised ... http://www.topjokes.info/the-indian-in-front-of-the-hardware-store-joke/ A plane crashed near a desert island and the only survivors were a man and Cindy Crawford. As the days passed into weeks and the weeks passed into months, they grew closer until, eventually, they were sleeping together. After a year or more of living out everyman's fantasy, the man ... http://www.topjokes.info/plane-crash-near-a-desert-island-joke/