My daddy sleeps neked

“Late again?” Miss Crabtree scolded Little Johnny. “It ain’t my fault,” said Little Johnny. “This is my Daddy’s fault. I’m three hours late cause Daddy sleeps naked!” Miss Crabtree had taught grammar school for over thirty years but had never heard that one before. “Exactly what does that mean, Johnny?” “Well, Miss Crabtree, a coyote’s been hangin’ round the ranch lately. He’s killed six hens and Ma’s best goat. So last night, when Daddy heard a noise out in the chicken pen, he grabbed his gun and told Ma, ‘That coyote’s back again. I’m a’gonna git ‘im!'” He told us kids to stay inside and he ran out naked as a jaybird, no boots, no pants, no shirt, no nuttin’! He crawled out to the hen house, stuck his shotgun through the window of the chicken coop. As he tried to see into the dark coop, our hound dog came sneakin’ up behind him and stuck his cold nose right up Daddy’s behind! Miss Crabtree, we been cleanin’ chickens since three o’clock this mornin!'”

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