A pair of two-thousand-year-old statues in the center of a Roman park was struck by lighting, causing them to come to life. The naked male statue ran to the naked female statue. “Have you been thinking what I’ve been thinking these centuries?” “Oh, yes,” she whispered, “let’s do it!” and they raced off together into the bushes. When they emerged, the male statue gazed longingly back at the bushes and whispered, “You know, it may be centuries before this happens again. Want to do it again?” “Sure,” gushed the female statue, “but this time, you hold the pigeon down while I crap on him!”