A guy is about three steps inside a bar when he realizes it’s a gay bar. “What the heck? I really want a drink,” he thinks, and sits down. A waiter approaches and says, “what’s the name of your penis?” The guy says, “look, buddy, I’m not into that. All I want is a drink.” The waiter says, “I’m sorry, sir, but I can’t serve you until you give me the name of your penis.” So the customer says, “all right, you go first: what’s the name of your penis?” The waiter says “Nike… as in, ‘Just Do It.'” The guy only thinks a moment, then says, “my penis is called ‘Secret.'” “Secret?” “Yeah… strong enough for a man, but made for a woman!”

In the Spring of 1957, Bobby, a real cool cat with his own wheels, went to pick up his date. “Carrie’s not ready yet, Bobby. Why don’t you have a seat?” says her dad. “Okay,” says Bobby. “What are you two kids planning to do tonight?” Bobby replies politely, “Oh, we’ll probably go to the soda shop or maybe take in a movie.” “Why don’t you two go out and screw?” asks Carrie’s dad. “I hear all the kids are doing it.” Bobby is taken aback. “Wha, what did you say?” he stammered. Her dad repeated, “I say, Carrie really likes to screw. Why she’d screw all night if her mother and I would let her!” Bobby’s eyes lit up. The evening was shaping up nicely. Eventually Carrie bopped down the stairs in her cute little poodle skirt and announced she was ready to go. Bobby eagerly escorted her out the front door. Not twenty minutes later, Carrie raced back into the house, slammed the door, and screamed at her father. “Dammit, Daddy! It’s called ‘The TWIST!'”